Redlines

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On Names, Pronouns, and Paragraphing

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Vol. 104 No. 3 (2020-21) | Judges on the March

Lawsuits involve people. And rather than turn them into a disembodied “Plaintiff” and “Defendant,” opinions might better use their names. The opinions will be more direct and more human. (Of […]

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Headings, please. The more, the better

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Vol. 104 No. 2 (2020) | Coping with COVID

REDLINES If there’s a good reason why many judicial opinions don’t use informative headings, I haven’t heard it. For readers, headings are a boon to navigating through the opinion. And […]

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The Plague of String Citations

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Vol. 104 No. 1 (2020) | A Clearer View

Check out the original paragraph from this opinion, which dealt with a motion to quash two subpoenas on grounds of attorney-client privilege. In the entire 262-word paragraph, covering 20 lines, […]

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Zap Multiword Prepositions, Please

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Vol. 102 No. 2 (2018) | Rights That Made The World Right

Probably the worst small-scale fault in legal writing is unnecessary prepositional phrases, a fault that this column will keep going after. A noxious variant is the multiword preposition — a […]

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Go Light on Heavy Connectors

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Vol. 103 No. 2 (2019) | Pay NCAA athletes?

One of the easiest ways to significantly improve all forms of legal writing is to replace heavy logical connectors with lighter ones (or none at all, where appropriate). Unfortunately, the […]

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Redlines

Let’s ditch unnecessary procedural detail

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Vol. 102 No. 1 (2018) | Forensic Fail

This Redlines column looks different from the previous ones. For one thing, it doesn’t have any redlines — but rather a simple before and after. Our writing guru, Joseph Kimble, […]

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Repairing Long Sentences (PDF)

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Vol. 102 No. 3 (2018) | Crowdsourcing and Data Analytics

The long, long sentence is legal writing’s oldest curse. You’ve probably seen even worse than the original sentence, but it’s still way too long (83 words). I offer three different […]

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A little less stiff, and no tangents, please.

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Vol. 101 No. 4 (2017) | Equal opportunity?

Our writing guru, Joseph Kimble, goes after some common blemishes. In the original opinion, he notes, the second half of the first sentence seems pointless. So does the third sentence, […]

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Bullet points, yes. Unnecessary dates, no. (PDF)

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Vol. 101 No. 3 (2017) | Bold and Persistent Reform

REDLINES Our writing guru, Joseph Kimble, simplifies and adds punch with some fairly quick fixes. He notes: The opinion deals with Defendant’s motion to quash Plaintiff’s notice of deposition. Before […]

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